My grandma died on October 2, 2010. I know she's in Heaven but I would love to see her again on earth. My grandma lived with my aunty in Korea. She was already hurting all over her body so I'm happy she's feeling no pain whatsoever. The sad thing is she died alone. I love you Grandma!!!! <3<3<3<3

So, I haven't been writing on this bloggy thing for quite some time. For the first time, I've been happy. Not just on the outside appearance, but I've actually been really happy :)(: Ever since I started going back to church (not just Sunday mornings) I've started to make friends who believe in the same God I do. They are such sweet people :)(: So I guess I've been so busy that I just pushed away my depression for more than 3 months. WOOOHOOOO!!! Haha. But I need to let out my feelings to a couselor or something.
I really want to be in a relationship. I see all of my friends in relationships and it just seems to be so great. That's not the only reason. I want him to tell me I'm beautiful everyday so that would drown out the voices inside my head telling me otherwise. I want him to treat me like a lady. I might be old school but I want him to open doors for me. I want him to have respect towards my parents, and so on... but I can't see myself with any man. That's probably why I like reading Love Inspired (christian books) books. They take me away from this life for a brief time, and in that brief time the book is my home. But then I always have to come back to reality.